Funny Quotes

Best Bart Simpson Quotes 2021

Bart Simpson’s, the only boy child of Homer and Marge Simpson, full name is Bartholomew Jojo Simpson. You might not have realized that the 90s cultural icon was voiced by a girl, Nancy Cartwright! Seeing as how he was 10 when the show aired that makes sense though!

Bart Simpson inspired a lot of the lingo’ we 90s kids used. I remember frequently hearing Bart Simpson’s quote, “Eat my shorts!”

What other wacky and edgy things did Bart Simpson say of The Simpson’s incredibly long run? Keep reading through these Bart Simpson quotes to find out! Granted, many of his catchphrases aren’t said by the cool kids anymore, but they are still pretty funny!

Bart became a popular character, in part because of the off-the-cuff things he would say. His mischievousness, rebelliousness, and disrespect for authority also contributed to the character’s prominent role on the show.

50 Rebellious Bart Simpson Quotes That Make You Feel Like a 90s Kid Again

Bart Simpson quotes that turned into famous catchphrases

1. “Eat my shorts!” ― Bart Simpson

2. “Don’t have a cow, man.” ― Bart Simpson

3. “Get bent.” ― Bart Simpson

4. “I’m Bart Simpson, who the hell are you?” ― Bart Simpson

5. “I didn’t do it! Nobody saw me do it. You can’t prove anything!” ― Bart Simpson

6. “Aw, Geez!” ― Bart Simpson

7. “Whoa, mama!” ― Bart Simpson

8. “Ay, caramba!” ― Bart Simpson

Prank Call Bart Simpson quotes

9. Moe: “Moe’s Tavern.”

Bart: “Is Mr. Freely there?”

Moe: “Who?”

Bart: “Freely, first initials I. P.”

Moe: “Hold on, I’ll check. Uh, is I. P. Freely here? Hey, everybody! I pee freely!”

10. Bart: “Hello? Is Homer there?”

Moe: “Homer who?”

Bart: “Homer …Sexual.”

Moe: “Wait one sec. Let me check. Uh, Homer Sexual? Uh, come on. Come on. One of you guys has gotta be Homer Sexual.”

11. Moe: “Hello, Moe’s Tavern. Birthplace of the Rob Roy.”

Bart: “Is Seymour there? Last name Butz.”

Moe: “Just a sec. Hey, is there a Butz here? Seymour Butz? Hey, everybody! I want a Seymour Butz!”

12. Moe: “Moe’s Tavern, where the elite meet to drink.”

Bart: “Uh, yeah, hello. Is Mike there? Last name, Rotch?”

Moe: “Hold on, I’ll check. Mike Rotch! Mike Rotch! Hey, has anybody seen Mike Rotch lately?”

Bart Simpson quotes and catchphrases about himself

13. “I cheated on the intelligence test. I’m sorry. But I just want to say that the past few weeks have been great. Me and you have done stuff together. You’ve helped me out with things and we’re closer than we’ve ever been. I love you, Dad. And I think if something can bring us that close it can’t possibly be bad.” ― Bart Simpson

14. “I’ve done a lot of bad stuff through the years. Now I’m paying the price but there’s so many things I’ll never get a chance to do: smoke a cigarette, use a fake I.D., shave a swear word in my hair…” ― Bart Simpson

15. “You think I’m dumb enough to fall for that? I’m insulted.” ― Bart Simpson

16. “I like to call this story ‘Hungry are the Damned’.” ― Bart Simpson

17. “Hey, cool, I’m dead.” ― Bart Simpson

18. “I can’t promise I’ll try, but I’ll try to try.” ― Bart Simpson

19. “Your Honor, it’s not easy being my parents. I’m always screwing up in school and getting in trouble with the law. But if I grow up to be a halfway-decent person, I know it’ll be because of my mom and dad. Everyone else might give up on me, but my parents never will.” ― Bart Simpson

20. “You got the brains and talent to go as far as you want and when you do, I’ll be right there to borrow money.” ― Bart Simpson

21. “That’s not fair! I’m ten times the Krusty fan you are. I even have the Krusty Home Pregnancy test!” ― Bart Simpson

22. “You’re turning me into a criminal when all I want to be is a petty thug.” ― Bart Simpson

23. “I won’t eat much and I don’t know the difference between right and wrong.” ― Bart Simpson

24. “I’m halfway through it, I swear!” ― Bart Simpson

25. “I wasn’t going to gamble. I just wanted a Bloody Mary.” ― Bart Simpson

26. “Mom, Dad, just so you don’t hear any wild rumors, I’m being indicted for fraud in Australia.” ― Bart Simpson

27. “No, you don’t understand. I tried. I really tried.” ― Bart Simpson

28. “Dad, I have as much respect for you as I ever did or ever will.” ― Bart Simpson

Bart Simpson quotes about life

29. “Well, enjoy it while you can. Everything changes when you get to big one-o. Your legs start to go. Candy doesn’t taste as good anymore.” ― Bart Simpson

30. “My chunky brothers! Gorge yourselves at the trough of freedom!” ― Bart Simpson

31. “I didn’t think it was physically possible, but this both sucks and blows.” ― Bart Simpson

32. “She’s like a Milk Dud, Lis. Sweet on the outside, poison on the inside.” ― Bart Simpson

33. “If you don’t watch the violence, you’ll never get desensitized to it.” ― Bart Simpson

34. “Wow, that is the biggest Rice Krispies square I’ve ever seen! The rich sure know how to live.” ― Bart Simpson

35. “I thought dabbling in the black arts would be good for a chuckle. How wrong I was.” ― Bart Simpson

36. “Nothing you say can upset us. We’re the MTV generation.” ― Bart Simpson

37. “There’s only one thing to do at a moment like this: strut!” ― Bart Simpson

Random Bart Simpson quotes

38. “Ew, baby spit! YOU suck.” ― Bart Simpson

39. “Alright, that’s it! I’ve been scorched by Krusty before. I got a rapid heartbeat from his Krusty brand vitamins. My Krusty Kalculator didn’t have a 7 or an 8, and Krusty’s autobiography was self-serving with many glaring omissions. But this time, he’s gone too far! WE WANT KRUSTY!” ― Bart Simpson

40. “I just want the whole world to know that this was a really crappy camp. [covers microphone with his hand] Can I say ‘crappy’ on TV?” ― Bart Simpson

41. “Very scary, Mr. Flanders, but I’ve got a story so scary you’ll wet your pants.” ― Bart Simpson

42. “So much for the days when I could say, ‘At least my mother’s normal.’” ― Bart Simpson

43. “I think Grandpa smells like that trunk in the garage where the bottom’s all wet.” ― Bart Simpson

44. Homer: “About last night. You might have noticed Daddy acting a little strange and you probably don’t understand why.”

Bart: “I understand why. You were wasted.”

45. Milhouse: “You shake it up, and it tells the future!”

Bart: “Really? Will I pass my English test? [shakes the ball] ‘Outlook Not So Good.’ Wow, it does work!”

46. “Hey, Otto, man; I have a test today that I am not ready for! Could you please crash the bus or something?” ― Bart Simpson

47. “I’ve done everything I could and I’ve only got 35 bucks! Ughh! I am through with working, working is for chumps.” ― Bart Simpson

48. “Homer, your half-ass under-parenting was better than your half-ass over-parenting.” ― Bart Simpson

49. “Part of this D-minus belongs to God.” ― Bart Simpson

50. “There’s a 4:30 in the morning now?” ― Bart Simpson

Bart Simpson Quotes

Lisa: Bart, we can’t let Bob steal the spotlight like this. We’re gonna have to sink to the lowest common denominator.

Bart: I can do that.”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 6: Sideshow Bob Roberts
“Mom, Dad, just so you don’t hear any wild rumors, I’m being indicted for fraud in Australia.”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 6: Bart vs. Australia
Homer: About last night. You might have noticed Daddy acting a little strange and you probably don’t understand why.

Bart: I understand why. You were wasted.”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 2: The War of the Simpsons
Milhouse: You shake it up, and it tells the future!

Bart: Really? Will I pass my English test? [shakes the ball] ‘Outlook Not So Good.’ Wow, it does work!”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 3: Bart’s Friend Falls in Love
Bart: Hey, Otto, man; I have a test today that I am not ready for! Could you please crash the bus or something?

Otto: Sorry, Bart Dude. Can’t do it on purpose. But, hey, maybe you’ll get lucky!”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 2: Bart Gets an F
“I think Grandpa smells like that trunk in the garage where the bottom’s all wet.”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 2: Old Money
“You’re turning me into a criminal when all I want to be is a petty thug.”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 6: Bart’s Girlfriend
“I won’t eat much and I don’t know the difference between right and wrong.”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 7: Raging Abe Simpson and His Grumbling Grandson in “The Curse of the Flying Hellfish”
“I thought dabbling in the black arts would be good for a chuckle. How wrong I was.”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 4: Treehouse of Horror III
“I’ve done everything I could and I’ve only got 35 bucks! Ughh! I am through with working, working is for chumps.”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 2: Three Men and a Comic Book
“Everything changes when you get to big one-o. Your legs start to go, candy doesn’t taste as good anymore.”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 3: Stark Raving Dad
Bart: Warm. No, cold. Colder. Ice cold.

Homer: You know where my keys are?

Bart: No, I’m talking about your breakfast.”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 1: Moaning Lisa
Tagged: warmer, colder, Closer, Missing, keys, breakfast
“Homer, your half ass under-parenting was better than your half ass over-parenting.”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 6: Grampa vs. Sexual Inadequacy
Tagged: Half Ass, under parenting, over parenting, better
“Dad, I have as much respect for you as I ever did or ever will.”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 2: The War of the Simpsons
“I am familiar with the works of Pablo Neruda.”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 7: Bart Sells His Soul
“No, You don’t understand. I tried. I really tried.”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 2: Bart Gets an F
“Part of this D-minus belongs to God.”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 2: Bart Gets an F
“I’m halfway through it, I swear!”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 4: Marge Gets a Job
“I think I read somewhere that cows like being killed.”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 10: Maximum Homerdrive
“I wasn’t going to gamble. I just wanted a bloody mary.”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 11: Bart to the Future
“Ballet?! Dancing is for girls.”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 6: Homer vs. Patty & Selma
“ Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, contrary to what you’ve just seen, war is neither glamorous nor fun. There are no winners, only losers. There are no good wars, with the following exceptions: The American Revolution, World War II, and the Star Wars trilogy.”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 1: Bart the General
Moe: Moe’s Tavern.

Bart: Hello, is Al there?

Moe: Al?

Bart: Yeah, Al. Last name: Coholic.

Moe: Lemme check… Phone call for Al. Al Coholic. Is there an Al Coholic here?”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 1: Some Enchanted Evening
“Nothing you say can upset us. We’re the MTV generation.”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 4: Homer’s Triple Bypass
“Hey, cool, I’m dead.”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 2: Bart Gets Hit by a Car
“There’s only one thing to do at a moment like this: strut!”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 6: Bart’s Girlfriend
“There’s a 4:30 in the morning now?”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 6: Bart’s Comet
“Ew, baby spit! YOU suck.”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 2: Treehouse of Horror
“Woah, that’s a good Squishee.”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 5: Boy-Scoutz ‘n the Hood
“I didn’t do it. Nobody saw me do it. You can’t prove anything.”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 1: Moaning Lisa
Bart: Dad, when did you record an album?

Homer: I’m surprised you don’t remember, son. It was only 8 years ago.

Bart: Dad, thanks to television I can’t remember what happened 8 minutes ago.”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 5: Homer’s Barbershop Quartet
“But who’d want to hurt me? I’m this century’s Dennis the Menace!”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 5: Cape Feare
“As God is my witness, I can pass the fourth grade.”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 2: Bart Gets an F
“Oh, Space Mutants 4! Drop me off! Drop me off!”

 Bart Simpson, The Simpsons, Season 1: The Telltale Head

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *